Thursday Thoughts

This morning we went in for a quick ultrasound to check the baby before we leave town for a short vacation. According to the tech, everything was looking good. Our baby girl was head down today so we are hoping that she stays that way now. The unfortunate side was that she was facing my back and would not rotate enough for us to get a good 4D picture… or any picture for that matter. The only really good picture we got was of her ear. It was one of the most beautiful ears I’ve ever seen! =) She was measuring a few days behind but not so far that it was concerning. The tech measured my fluid but didn’t say anything good or bad about it so it must have been fine. If something is off I would assume that my doctor would be giving me a call to let us know.

I was feeling really down yesterday. This journey towards D/s that I am on feels like it’s starting to wear on me. So I went back to Google and searched blogs for those who have been through this or currently going through this. It seems to be quite common for the submissive partner to be the one to instigate things. I got a few ideas from some other subs on how to proceed with getting through to my Husband. I don’t think He quite understands just how serious I am about the matter. I think that I am going to need to write down my thoughts and try to organize them. As terrifying as it is, I need to bare my soul completely to Him. I think it might be the only way to truly convince Him just how much I do need this. A year ago (when I first started researching), I identified my submissive personality in the bedroom. It wasn’t until after we got married that I realized that this was more than just a bedroom thing. I hadn’t realized that I had a deep need for this as a lifestyle. Explaining all of this to Him has proven to be one of the most difficult things I’ve needed to do. We shall see.

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